A Season of Hope - Our Jackson turns 4

Thursday, December 18, 2008

I have had many ask me why I was playing Christmas music on my blog right after Halloween. Why? That music has so many messages of hope and gratitude and I would play it all year if I could get away with it. And Christmas 2004 was my husband and I's Christmas of hope. We had been married nearly 10 years and all attempts to grow our family were unsuccessful. Around Labor Day that year, we were called into our social workers office to find out our greatest dream was to be fulfilled. A birthmom had chosen us for her baby boy due on December 29th!!! Now I totally understand that 9 months of carrying a child is long and uncomfortable but those were the longest 4 months of our lives!! (And with a chance she could change her mind in that time, every day slowly ticked by). Halloween came and went I could hardly wait to start playing Christmas music when in the years past, Christmas was very meloncholy. It is very much a holiday for children and we sat by year after year with no children to share it with. I didn't care that he was due after Christmas, it was truly a Christmas to look forward to. As Christmas was a week away, we got even a better surprise. Our beautiful, sweet birthmom wanted us to have our baby by Christmas so with all things developing great, she was going to be induced on the 20th! Well, Jackson was as excited for Christmas that year as much as we were! We woke up on the 19th of December - 4 years ago tomorrow - to another phone call to find our birthmom had gone into labor. And a long labor... he was born around 5 PM! Because it was a closed adoption, she had the 2 days in the hospital with him all to herself and we went and got him on the 21st. That was a spectacular day and I will write more about that on the 21st. I really wish I could post a picture of our birthmom with Jackson. She was so sweet and they both looked like angels! (it was a private adoption and confidentiality is so important.) She never waivered in her decision to place him in our family.
So now I see very common ordinary placed things and think how lucky we are. We were at a movie the other day (sans Jackson) and I was noticing the booster chairs in a corner for children. Something so simple brought a smile to my face - we actually have use for those! And at one time, the high chairs at a restaurant. And I can venture into the baby department of any store and smile instead of wanting to cry! So Happy 4th Birthday Jackson! You have blessed our lives and family in so many ways. You are such a thoughtful and happy boy. Please don't ever stop the random nearly hourly "I love you Mom" 's. I AM your mom and you ARE my son and I love you! Truly a witness to all those who hope.